It's only when your brakes stop working you learn to live without them (-:=
Friday, April 23, 2004
Wednesday, April 21, 2004
For once, I've broken the happy/sad/happy/sad thingy and am relitively content at this point in time thankyou very much.
Snatch is such a good film. It has succeded in making me feel like blowing everyone's heads off and swearing loudly at them in the meanwhile. What fun! I'm feeling so evil. HAH. Except I've just annoyed two people on msn already, so I'm going to avoid people for a bit I think-for their safety and mine.
I'm such an idiot sometimes. I keep wanting to write about this. I dunno..I do silly things..I mean most people do..I'm not saying I, alone, am an idiot and the rest of the world is perfect..I'm just leaving the rest of the world out of this - I can't talk for them. And by 'idiot' I mean I annoy myself with stupid things sometimes. "I shouldn't have said that".. or similar things. Although I'm not regretful..because it's all part of learning and growing, but it would have been more useful to not have been like that to start with.
But if I learn by these things..shouldn't I become less of an idiot and do more things the way I want to and approach a plateau of ultimate and ideal state of non-idiotness..? That could possibly be the second before I die..seeing as you learn from the rest of life, but I doubt that happens. Brain cells do deteriorate, along with skin and bones. I might even get parkinsons or altzheimers and completly change who I am..rendering all my learning from being stupid useless. So if I die at 80 (that'd be a pretty coolish age to die at maybe) then maybe that point wouldn't be the optimum state.
Unless- I die before the onset of old age would begin the disintegration of my mind...then my thoughts would be in working order enough to remember the lessons learnt and still have all the possible time before hand- making me less silly then 2 minutes before?
This is assuming, also, that every occurance gathers up to form a bundle of good ol' experience, therefore knowledge and common sense of the world. Is it possible to become more silly? more idiotic and annoying. Well why not. So all the learning and experiencing life n stuff can be thrown over by a trauma or accident? or even something as simple as something someone says maybe?
Hmmm.. I'm not sure. maybe there's different sectors of cleverness.. all the possible learning and experience in one area of life... like social..maybe..wouldn't help one bit with something to do with.. say... trying to find somewhere to stay in a completely foreign country?
Ooooooor maybe... I'm being to general in my term of 'idiotic'? Possibly..I don't really care now I'd think I'd rather go for a bike ride. And play pretending-to-shoot-each-other with my brother. Get some more life in me. Next blog: filling time filling life filling your brain (and hopefully no shooting people) (unless I might watch Lock stock before hand...(-:= )
c*
Snatch is such a good film. It has succeded in making me feel like blowing everyone's heads off and swearing loudly at them in the meanwhile. What fun! I'm feeling so evil. HAH. Except I've just annoyed two people on msn already, so I'm going to avoid people for a bit I think-for their safety and mine.
I'm such an idiot sometimes. I keep wanting to write about this. I dunno..I do silly things..I mean most people do..I'm not saying I, alone, am an idiot and the rest of the world is perfect..I'm just leaving the rest of the world out of this - I can't talk for them. And by 'idiot' I mean I annoy myself with stupid things sometimes. "I shouldn't have said that".. or similar things. Although I'm not regretful..because it's all part of learning and growing, but it would have been more useful to not have been like that to start with.
But if I learn by these things..shouldn't I become less of an idiot and do more things the way I want to and approach a plateau of ultimate and ideal state of non-idiotness..? That could possibly be the second before I die..seeing as you learn from the rest of life, but I doubt that happens. Brain cells do deteriorate, along with skin and bones. I might even get parkinsons or altzheimers and completly change who I am..rendering all my learning from being stupid useless. So if I die at 80 (that'd be a pretty coolish age to die at maybe) then maybe that point wouldn't be the optimum state.
Unless- I die before the onset of old age would begin the disintegration of my mind...then my thoughts would be in working order enough to remember the lessons learnt and still have all the possible time before hand- making me less silly then 2 minutes before?
This is assuming, also, that every occurance gathers up to form a bundle of good ol' experience, therefore knowledge and common sense of the world. Is it possible to become more silly? more idiotic and annoying. Well why not. So all the learning and experiencing life n stuff can be thrown over by a trauma or accident? or even something as simple as something someone says maybe?
Hmmm.. I'm not sure. maybe there's different sectors of cleverness.. all the possible learning and experience in one area of life... like social..maybe..wouldn't help one bit with something to do with.. say... trying to find somewhere to stay in a completely foreign country?
Ooooooor maybe... I'm being to general in my term of 'idiotic'? Possibly..I don't really care now I'd think I'd rather go for a bike ride. And play pretending-to-shoot-each-other with my brother. Get some more life in me. Next blog: filling time filling life filling your brain (and hopefully no shooting people) (unless I might watch Lock stock before hand...(-:= )
c*
Sunday, April 11, 2004
Hey Hey (-:= In my true blog alternation of happy/sad updates, I'm now happy! I had a good time at Danny's 'do' although at one point I got a bit solitary-feeling, but there we go. Although the next day after going to sleep roughtly at 4 a.m..waking up not much after, having waffles then driving Beffy home, going home myself, back down to danny's for a bit, back to Kath & Janie's then off to see Davy in hospital, then back to kathy's and drawing with pete, then back to bethy's for a bit of giggling, then home and then to msn then bed! -was equally as fun!
Things are on the whole going well...well actually they're going pretty normal but I've been around giggly and nice people more and I'm just enjoying stuff. It's basically fun. (-:=
Heheh...My sister's got a horsey magazine by the computer, and while waiting for the internet and msn to come on I glanced through the first few pages..hehe they're funny, and so biasted! Here is a selection of funny bits from the magazine cleverly named......."HORSE" :
(hehe..the name itself makes me giggle... heh..)
"horses rescued from sinking ferry" (heheeh)
"Farriers unite" (I thought there was only like two..and they're both called kevin...aren't they...)
"Pictures of the british country side in the 1970s and 80s show little ragwort in the Uk. today, however there seems to be few places the plant doesn't flourish.
One of the main reasons is that, in most parts of the country, verges are no longer sprayed. While it is sometimes claimed that this is for environmental reasons, to prevent non harmful plants being affected, it may often be a case of spending cuts.." -excuse me? just because ragwort kills horses a bit if silly people let them eat it... has it occured to you... "Carloyn".. that it is for environmental reasons!!! you're horse will be ingesting all those chemicals you crappy-head! "sometimes claimed" -god it is better not to spray. GRR silly person.
It then goes on to say how good this plant is at surviving and how there's not antidote for horses and how evil the whole world is except horses and their owners and everyone should be shot and sprayed. -well something to that extent.
Oh I'm so tired and achey and my head hurts... so terribly worn out.. I'm going to finish this later. see you all *mwah*
Things are on the whole going well...well actually they're going pretty normal but I've been around giggly and nice people more and I'm just enjoying stuff. It's basically fun. (-:=
Heheh...My sister's got a horsey magazine by the computer, and while waiting for the internet and msn to come on I glanced through the first few pages..hehe they're funny, and so biasted! Here is a selection of funny bits from the magazine cleverly named......."HORSE" :
(hehe..the name itself makes me giggle... heh..)
"horses rescued from sinking ferry" (heheeh)
"Farriers unite" (I thought there was only like two..and they're both called kevin...aren't they...)
"Pictures of the british country side in the 1970s and 80s show little ragwort in the Uk. today, however there seems to be few places the plant doesn't flourish.
One of the main reasons is that, in most parts of the country, verges are no longer sprayed. While it is sometimes claimed that this is for environmental reasons, to prevent non harmful plants being affected, it may often be a case of spending cuts.." -excuse me? just because ragwort kills horses a bit if silly people let them eat it... has it occured to you... "Carloyn".. that it is for environmental reasons!!! you're horse will be ingesting all those chemicals you crappy-head! "sometimes claimed" -god it is better not to spray. GRR silly person.
It then goes on to say how good this plant is at surviving and how there's not antidote for horses and how evil the whole world is except horses and their owners and everyone should be shot and sprayed. -well something to that extent.
Oh I'm so tired and achey and my head hurts... so terribly worn out.. I'm going to finish this later. see you all *mwah*
Hey Hey (-:= In my true blog alternation of happy/sad updates, I'm now happy! I had a good time at Danny's 'do' although at one point I got a bit solitary-feeling, but there we go. Although the next day after going to sleep roughtly at 4 a.m..waking up not much after, having waffles then driving Beffy home, going home myself, back down to danny's for a bit, back to Kath & Janie's then off to see Davy in hospital, then back to kathy's and drawing with pete, then back to bethy's for a bit of giggling, then home and then to msn then bed! -was equally as fun!
Things are on the whole going well...well actually they're going pretty normal but I've been around giggly and nice people more and I'm just enjoying stuff. It's basically fun. (-:=
Heheh...My sister's got a horsey magazine by the computer, and while waiting for the internet and msn to come on I glanced through the first few pages..hehe they're funny, and so biasted! Here is a selection of funny bits from the magazine cleverly named......."HORSE" :
(hehe..the name itself makes me giggle... heh..)
"horses rescued from sinking ferry" (heheeh)
"Farriers unite" (I thought there was only like two..and they're both called kevin...aren't they...)
"Pictures of the british country side in the 1970s and 80s show little ragwort in the Uk. today, however there seems to be few places the plant doesn't flourish.
One of the main reasons is that, in most parts of the country, verges are no longer sprayed. While it is sometimes claimed that this is for environmental reasons, to prevent non harmful plants being affected, it may often be a case of spending cuts.." -excuse me? just because ragwort kills horses a bit if silly people let them eat it... has it occured to you... "Carloyn".. that it is for environmental reasons!!! you're horse will be ingesting all those chemicals you crappy-head! "sometimes claimed" -god it is better not to spray. GRR silly person.
It then goes on to say how good this plant is at surviving and how there's not antidote for horses and how evil the whole world is except horses and their owners and everyone should be shot and sprayed. -well something to that extent.
Oh I'm so tired and achey and my head hurts... so terribly worn out.. I'm going to finish this later. see you all *mwah*
Things are on the whole going well...well actually they're going pretty normal but I've been around giggly and nice people more and I'm just enjoying stuff. It's basically fun. (-:=
Heheh...My sister's got a horsey magazine by the computer, and while waiting for the internet and msn to come on I glanced through the first few pages..hehe they're funny, and so biasted! Here is a selection of funny bits from the magazine cleverly named......."HORSE" :
(hehe..the name itself makes me giggle... heh..)
"horses rescued from sinking ferry" (heheeh)
"Farriers unite" (I thought there was only like two..and they're both called kevin...aren't they...)
"Pictures of the british country side in the 1970s and 80s show little ragwort in the Uk. today, however there seems to be few places the plant doesn't flourish.
One of the main reasons is that, in most parts of the country, verges are no longer sprayed. While it is sometimes claimed that this is for environmental reasons, to prevent non harmful plants being affected, it may often be a case of spending cuts.." -excuse me? just because ragwort kills horses a bit if silly people let them eat it... has it occured to you... "Carloyn".. that it is for environmental reasons!!! you're horse will be ingesting all those chemicals you crappy-head! "sometimes claimed" -god it is better not to spray. GRR silly person.
It then goes on to say how good this plant is at surviving and how there's not antidote for horses and how evil the whole world is except horses and their owners and everyone should be shot and sprayed. -well something to that extent.
Oh I'm so tired and achey and my head hurts... so terribly worn out.. I'm going to finish this later. see you all *mwah*
Tuesday, April 06, 2004
Oh I'm really quite unhappy. I feel bad. and I don't understand. But anyway.
Drama prac went ok. My lines were ok, the examiner was a bit of a librarian: late-middle-aged, glasses on the tip of her nose, feathery hair, bit of a wet cloth. (whetever I mean by that). We'll see in August how it really went anyway.
I came online at this hour of daylight (7pm ish) to see if any of my dear buddies were online to cheer me up a bit. But alas msn messenger isn't working. How could anyone let this happen?! it's my life line.. if it was working I'd probably be brilliantly happy by now and bouncung all over the place or gone for a walk or something. Urgh.
NOTHING is happening this easter. In a whole two weeks. nothing. Nothing at all except one rubbishy drum n bass night thing I've been to enough already and I'll probably end up driving again which means no drink which means boredom slightly, and also someone who I'd like to go with isn't going. So that counts as practically nothing.
So depressing!!! )-:= What am I going to do!?! I have already thought of hosting or at least organizing some parties of some sort. but practicalities prevent anything from happening. Ohhhhh grr. I want to see people who aren't my family over the holidays. Maybe next week. You know, I think this is all be boiling down to one person, the feeling of missing the niceness of affection. )-:= janie's blog explains this feeling well. It's strange how one thing/person/arrangement/whatever can be the stimulus for such extreme feelings of happiness/unhappiness.
anyway. Damn stupid bloody msn.
What I feel like now is a hug. Hugs are one of the worlds best things. along with massages, touch, fruit and veg and yogurt covered raisins. Oh and rabbits, who are little bundles of hugginess.
I'm going to the computer trade show tomorrow in birmimghmahahaam. in the nec. Only problem is with that is I'm worried (if msn doesn't start to work) I'm going to be completely fed up and antisocial all day. Which won't be fun. But I'm sure I'll survive, and I'll forget all past feelings when the exitment of free squidgy blue computer shaped squidgy things are being given out.
PLEASE MSN!!!
Oh well. **confusing bit to anyone who doesn't know:** I keep thinking what I might have done wrong..is it me? or am i merely making it up. no. there is something. But how can I make it better? time maybe...but there isn't much. Hey...thursday.. thursday I'm in town.. maybe then. I don't understand, much. but there we go. Everything's a state of mind. Whatever happens happens.
er.. au revoir. *hug*
Drama prac went ok. My lines were ok, the examiner was a bit of a librarian: late-middle-aged, glasses on the tip of her nose, feathery hair, bit of a wet cloth. (whetever I mean by that). We'll see in August how it really went anyway.
I came online at this hour of daylight (7pm ish) to see if any of my dear buddies were online to cheer me up a bit. But alas msn messenger isn't working. How could anyone let this happen?! it's my life line.. if it was working I'd probably be brilliantly happy by now and bouncung all over the place or gone for a walk or something. Urgh.
NOTHING is happening this easter. In a whole two weeks. nothing. Nothing at all except one rubbishy drum n bass night thing I've been to enough already and I'll probably end up driving again which means no drink which means boredom slightly, and also someone who I'd like to go with isn't going. So that counts as practically nothing.
So depressing!!! )-:= What am I going to do!?! I have already thought of hosting or at least organizing some parties of some sort. but practicalities prevent anything from happening. Ohhhhh grr. I want to see people who aren't my family over the holidays. Maybe next week. You know, I think this is all be boiling down to one person, the feeling of missing the niceness of affection. )-:= janie's blog explains this feeling well. It's strange how one thing/person/arrangement/whatever can be the stimulus for such extreme feelings of happiness/unhappiness.
anyway. Damn stupid bloody msn.
What I feel like now is a hug. Hugs are one of the worlds best things. along with massages, touch, fruit and veg and yogurt covered raisins. Oh and rabbits, who are little bundles of hugginess.
I'm going to the computer trade show tomorrow in birmimghmahahaam. in the nec. Only problem is with that is I'm worried (if msn doesn't start to work) I'm going to be completely fed up and antisocial all day. Which won't be fun. But I'm sure I'll survive, and I'll forget all past feelings when the exitment of free squidgy blue computer shaped squidgy things are being given out.
PLEASE MSN!!!
Oh well. **confusing bit to anyone who doesn't know:** I keep thinking what I might have done wrong..is it me? or am i merely making it up. no. there is something. But how can I make it better? time maybe...but there isn't much. Hey...thursday.. thursday I'm in town.. maybe then. I don't understand, much. but there we go. Everything's a state of mind. Whatever happens happens.
er.. au revoir. *hug*
